3 Months Into The FS: Life in Northern VA/DC

Who could use a fun a post? Me!!!!

Here are a few rambling thoughts on life in the DC/Northern Virginia area:

Note- we are three months in to our new digs. We are growing in our understanding of life as a FS family. We are learning oh so much about politics and how well respected professions can get thrown under the bus (oops! did I say that???) when the blame game starts and how incredibly difficult it is to not blast our opinions all over the usual social media sites. But, today- I am choosing to focus on the lighter side and going to do my usual public relations bit. I love having the chance to welcome the next round of A-100 families to the area and give friends and family all over the place a little insight how interesting life is in Northern Virginia.

These are a few of the things we do here-

Spend money

Ex. Just today at Westover Farmer's Market- Paid $21 at the Number ONE Sons stand for the BEST mustard sauerkraut, cumin carrots and pretty darn good (but not exactly Mexican) salsa verde! It's pricey but who can resist sauerkraut or Farmer's Markets?

 Since moving here our grocery bill has at least doubled. We are not eating more. We are not eating out that much. We are not eating fancier food (unless by fancy you would include home grown stuff from farmer's markets). Nope... same stuff, lesser quality (veggies and fruits especially) and at least doubled in price. Except for Trader Joe's which is my absolute favorite place to shop at when HEB isn't close by.

Miss exits

You get ONE shot. Seriously. Only one notice. One! And the sign seems to appear about a 1/4 mile before the exit comes up so you best stay calm and in the center lane as much as possible. There is no feeder road for chickens like me. I don't know if that is just a Texas thing but I used feeder roads when I didn't know for sure where I was going. So, pretend you've missed your exit, if you are me you are thinking... "I'll just take the next exit and loop back".  Right? Well, Good luck! The truth is you can do that but if you do you can add 30 mins to your driving time. Best thing is to map out everything you can before you leave the house and compare the computer map with your drive thing on your phone/gps. BTW- the traffic here isn't that bad, or not by my experience. It's like any big city that is in a hurry.

Discover funky urban corners

We've found a few. Adam's Morgan and 18th was a welcome departure from the federal formality and marbled floors that are so common here. We were invited to go to this really good Ethiopian food restaurant on 18th but just hanging out in the neighborhood was worth the time it took for us to find parking. If you are coming to DC you must go to Adam's Morgan- if you enjoy life a little more on the casual side. The bright colors and fun stuff appeared a few turns after an extremely upscale area. It was like entering a whole new world. Adam's Morgan has an Austin/6th street vibe- minus the cool music. Think - hemp rope hooka joints, ethnic home cooking/spices, roof top bars, New York pizza stands and roasted coffee shops all piled up in an urban potpourri of sweaty humanity. Don't expect customer service or anything, and I'd bring cash, but you should make this spot a bucket list DC thing. You'll get an evening's worth of entertainment from just strolling up and down the streets.

Wait for the Orange Line

I love the freedom of taking my Metro Pass card and slapping it down on that screen thing as I get my turn in the pass through. I proudly blend in when I'm tromping down the broken escalator steps (on the left side- because I'm moving quick like a local nowadays) to the variously colored veins and arteries of life here in the DC area. Lately though, the Orange Line has seen some construction delays and it can take a while to see my "Vienna" pop up on the screen. It's worth the wait. One day soon, they will have completed the stop at Tyson's Corner and life will be forever be retail paradise.

The subways here seem to miss out on the arts and oddities that I loved so much while visiting San Francisco and attempts to make up for that by blasting political messages that provoke me to ponder/think about what the writer of such a message really wants from me. Some just make me wonder what the world is coming to... and that begets a whole other genre of thought, which causes me to put my ipod to good use, thus once again causing me to compare Metro to the BART (name of subway in SF). I so miss that dude with the dreds and a saxophone!

Eat amazing food

Well known among close friends is that our family is entirely too "food focused". We love the whole thing, especially the international stuff. We especially get a big kick out being the people who introduce friends and family to the newest or yummiest thing in foodie heaven. This place (Northern Virginia/DC), however, is doing the introducing this time, except for when it comes to Mexican food of course. Our family's favorite new find... Afghan cuisine! Who knew? The savory kabobs, the best falafel I've ever eaten-EVER, the simple but yummy rice and salads. It's fresh and the spices are just about perfect. I have big plans to learn how to cook as many of these recipes as possible before we head out to Jakarta -which naturally brings me to a point I have tried my best to avoid, both mentally and conversationally, but here it goes... I'm a bit worried about the food choices we'll have in Jakarta. Can I admit that without sounding like a white meat only-, processed foods-loving American? I'm willing to try just about anything but am cautious when it comes to meat (pretty much always the case for me-even stateside) and it seems that Indonesians like to use a little bit of meat or fish in just about every dish. This could make for a tricky food romance! In the past, when traveling outside the US, I usually go totally vegetarian. It's the safest bet for me and I almost always order the best food when I do! Who knows... maybe I will actually lose weight. That would be a welcome change!

Go hiking

I'll admit that we are not avid hikers, but Sean and I have a particular love affair with packing a backpack and heading outdoors. Only one of our kids seems to appreciate our affection for walking up hill in earthy tree filled places. Truly, one of the best things about being in this part of the country is being in close proximity to such beautiful countryside. Close by there is the popular Great Falls Park along the Potomac. But, a really big thrill for Sean and I was a recent trip to Cooper's Rock State Forest in wild wonderful West Virginia! The pictures posted here barely do it justice. Such a beautiful state and a nature lover's paradise, and only 3 and half hours away!

As young newlyweds we climbed this same hill and found some lady to take our picture. That was 21 years ago! Unfortunately, that picture but it's in storage otherwise I would share it here. This photo -being taken at this place- at this particular time in our lives is fairly symbolic for both Sean and I, not even the raindrops and fear of falling to our deaths could keep us away!

Attempt to sound out all the personalized license plates

I have no idea what the fascination is but there are plenty of DC and Virginia drivers paying extra (I assume) for personalized license plates. Honestly, I think it's great that folks care enough to entertain their traffic jam compadres with tricky riddles. You can tell these people put a lot of thought into their choices.

Here are a few "PA YO TXS", "OFR HOPE", "MMOF4", "CRE8JOBS", B8SPLYR",
my favorite... "B& aid".

I suppose personalizing your license plate offers folks a chance to express creativity and uniqueness in what is probably a very uptight, and heavily regulated work environment. Anyway, it's fun and worth noting.


Walk the dog
I'll spare our readers the grizzly details of dog duty but this routine is getting OLD for all of us- including the dog. She loved her giant yard in Laredo- it was all HERS. This mostly white, fluffy little girl kept our back yard free of all evil intruders. Mostly, her job was to chase all those darn black birds away from the tomato plants. But lately, she has to ask to go out and then has to walk down many flights of steps or wait for the elevator, and then she has to "go" where all the other dogs "go". No privacy. No running free. No birds to terrify. She's older so that helps but she's pretty cold here so the trade off is she gets to sit around in pretty doggy sweaters.

And- Last of but not least.... WONDER WHERE I HAVE MESSED UP AS A PARENT BECAUSE I'VE NEVER BOUGHT INTO THE BULL CRAP THAT MY KIDS HAVE TO BE GREAT AT EVERYTHING!

Is this idea specifically American- this far fetched expectation that our kids have to be some picture perfect "ideal" of a human? If so- pack us up and send us on to Jakarta as fast as possible! I'm not joking in the least. I'm truly disgusted. While I think the schools here are AWESOME, because they seem to be, this area of the country must have some seriously stressed out kids!
 Apparently, teenagers are supposed to have perfect grades, and play an instrument, and be outstanding at sports. They should follow social protocol (pretend to like you), self aware, politically in tune (you'd hope) and on top of current events. Their clothes are nice. They all believe that they MUST be accepted to a "top" university. They go to the gym, dermatologists, orthodontists, and church. They choose healthy foods. This is a true story, a girl at a youth group told Hannah that their family was completely fat free- to which Hannah replied "Wow, really? That sucks!" The young lady didn't laugh or smile. She just looked at Hannah, completely void of a sense of humor. Sadly, there are more stories to add to that one.
So, what's the big pay off for being able to swim upstream in this hyper competitive environment? These kids will supposedly be better at handling stress and are therefore more prepared for college life, which will lead to a good job, which will earn them lots of money or influence.. which (brace yourself...)  IS NOT ALWAYS TRUE!
Maybe I'm writing this at a really raw moment. Today I had a medical professional reaffirm what a school professional and a therapist told us earlier in the year, that most of the kids in the high schools around here have tutors, life/organizational coaches, and most will seek counseling at some point in their high school years for help dealing with the stress. A lady behind the counter at a local pharmacy told me that an inordinate amount of the people, especially high school and college students, in this neck of the woods are on some sort of anti-anxiety meds. Well... good LORD on a bicycle, I'm no M.D. but that says to me that SOMETHING is wrong! If it takes a team of helpers and a cocktail of pharmaceuticals to keep your kid in the game- get a new game!

What is going to happen to all these kids when they realize it wasn't true? That they didn't have to be perfect! When do they tell them that Santa isn't real or that they knew all along that they weren't actually good at everything? That you have limits to your abilities and that these limits are NOT bad things! This whole lie fosters a concept that they are only lovable, important, worthwhile if they are meeting these crazy pie-in-the-sky goals, if they look good on paper. And- that really, really worries me for these kids who are getting emotionally sick trying to do "their best" which is actually someone else's fantasy. What if they are flawed? Do they feel lovable, or good enough? What is going to happen to these kids if they grow up and give birth to an imperfect child? What is going to happen to them when their character and/or creativity is called upon at their job or life in general? They are being so incredibly over directed and lied to, and THAT concerns me.
This whole place makes me want to have a license plate that says, "stressuks"!

Okay, I realize I failed to produce a fun post, so here is something that might make you laugh...

Cairo and Benghazi

Here is a statement delivered by Secretary Clinton on the events of yesterday. I urge you to watch the whole thing:

Her expressions of anger, loss, and resolve reflected my own feelings very well.

It was a subdued day today at work, as you might imagine. Lots of people during breaks gathered around the televisions, watching cable news for the latest information on yesterday's events. Being all of eight weeks into my new career, I obviously didn't know the diplomats killed in Libya. But after hearing their biographies and listening to some veteran officers today, I know the type. Peace Corps or military service volunteer, posted to an area on a first assignment and continuing to invest a life to become an expert in a part of the world. From language, to history, to culture and politics, the time and training combine with care and motivation to turn an officer into a "hand," someone who can be called on to accurately give context and advice, and take action when things go sideways on the other side of the world. 

Ambassador Stevens was just such a person. From his Peace Corps work in Morocco through his career, he became our go-to diplomat in Libya. What a friend the Libyan people lost yesterday. I think about him, and FSO Sean Smith. Assigned to The Hague, and on a TDY (temporary duty assignment) to Libya, leaving behind a wife and two kids. They will never get their husband and father back. Two others were also lost, but their names and stories are not yet released.

And then I think about the members of my A-100 class. People who came into the Foreign Service with Peace Corps and language skills, that are being posted soon around the world. Some of us will move from region to region and bureau to bureau. Some of us will find "home" bureaus, and end up becoming Asia hands, or Africa hands. Some of us are going places that we already know are trouble, and are HAPPY to go. Others of us will be in places that right now seem safe, but could explode tomorrow. Ask anyone who was mildly disappointed with a two-year tour in "boring" Egypt in 2010. You just never know, and if you are totally risk-averse, you should choose a different career. I said earlier I know the type. I know it because I saw them in my A-100 class. Happy to go to dangerous, unaccompanied posts. People I know will be targets for our enemies now and in the years to come because they will be so damn good at their jobs. I can only hope I will be one of the good ones, too.

It's been a hard day. If you are in my line of work and didn't think about Ambassador Stevens, FSO Smith and the other two officers, then you are in denial. A black flag associated with al-Qaeda was raised over our embassy in Cairo, and a consulate was sacked and an ambassador and three others killed in Benghazi. When I was in the Navy Reserves in the early 90's I knew I could be called to danger but I also knew I would have weapons and training with which to defend myself. Our diplomats get called to dangerous places without those defenses, and still they go. 

Our little family spread across the world has lost four of its members. They will be missed. We will carry on.

-S

Small School, Big Changes

We survived! Our marathon summer of 2012 is officially over and we are now in first week of school stupor.

I'd call it a successful first week-only three or four emotional breakdowns so far, one forgotten lunch (well..sort of), one missed bus, three frantic calls by mom to the school admin and two schedule change requests, tons of homework, and only one serious request to be sent back "home" to Laredo - And that was just the oldest two.

I have got to give them credit- they are trying their best to deal with a mountain of change. Moving during the high school years is very hard to do, but add any exponent to it when it's your Senior year (our oldest). The poor things...we lived in the same town for nine years which translates to "most of their lives". One interesting difference is going from a mega high school (her class size was about 1000 students) to a senior class of 120 kids! Their new high school has around 800 students total (8th- 12th grades).
Add to the big drama of moving the fact they are DEEP in the throes of culture shock. I don't think we realized just how Mexican Laredo really is until we moved away. Wait... I mean I knew it was Mexican in just about every aspect, true! And yes, it is actually Texas, but it is not culturally "American" (USA). It is very Mexican there- and honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. But it is very different from Northern Virginia. Please, I invite you to click on the link below to hear a live feed of the local Laredo radio station that my kids listened to every morning as the bus drivers blasted it through the speakers. Tejano music sounds like a party even if the guy is singing about his empty corazon (heart)!
 http://streamdb3web.securenetsystems.net/v4/index.cfm?stationCallSign=KBDR&relocateURL=true 
They miss the music, the food, the people, the whole thing... it's really hard right now for the oldest one especially to feel happy about being here. She points out how different "white people" are and how she can't relate and how incredibly odd that makes her- because she is a white person after all...but well- not really. It's tough right now. More posts to come on culture shock in the future.

Okay, this is not really their old bus, but the folks on this bus are listening to similar music that my kids heard each day on the school bus.

                     And now the bus is like this (but more diverse)...you get the idea.


There is a term within the State Dept/Foreign Service that helps explain what happens when parents raise their kids outside of the US. I actually learned more about this weekend. The FS kids often become what is called "third culture" kids.

And while such labels do remove some of the fear/frustration that we are alone in the world, it somehow actually adds to my current load of guilt, even though statistically these kids usually do quite well in every aspect of life, I never had to maneuver such an odd dynamic when I was growing up- that is where the guilt floods in. I don't know how it feels to be their age and be American but have so little in common with my American peers that nothing seems the same. All three of our kids are third culture kids. The oldest two were raised in the Mexican culture and our youngest was raised in rural Ethiopia for the first six years of  his life.
So, why is their culture shock a surprise to me? For one, I believe I have minimized the impact their surroundings had on the older two. I completely expect to see these types of things happening with our youngest, he is SOOO Ethiopian and he probably grew up right in the midst of his ancestral roots. But the oldest two? Really??  I did expect them all to have feelings like "it stinks being new", but I did not anticipate how this could/would translate into "I have no idea how to relate to these kids" feelings. It was really THAT different? Seriously?  Well, recently it struck me, even though we all agree that this place is great, it so very different from Laredo, TX. and we miss a lot of things and people we loved there. We were there long enough to feel like we belonged there.

The whole third culture tidbit was a revelation to me. It also explains WHY -even though the schools here are smaller, kind to new kids, better ranked, calm and orderly- my kids feel as if they have been dropped off on another planet instead of a nice, small American high school! I need to learn more and explore all of this when I have time to read and grasp the whole TCK dynamic. From what I gather the whole "Who Am I?" thing can be really hard to answer for kids who were raised in foreign places/cultures.

Our youngest, affectionately called Number 3 at times, thoroughly enjoyed his first week of  "big" school! We knew he would- but it took courage for him to step up on that bus this last week. This was an especially proud moment for us because it was literally his FIRST time to go to school outside our home or the orphanage he had been in. Since he became a McKeating kid back in 2010 he has learned TONS of new stuff. He came to us hardly speaking any English- but nowadays he is pretty close to fluent, he reads, writes, adds/subtracts and pretty much everything you might expect a kid in grade school to do- all thanks to the luxury of being homeschooled for the last two years. We are fans of homeschool but do not believe that it is the best option for every child, every family, or every year of their schooling. He had no desire to go to school, he was very happy learning from mom at home and I loved having the undivided time to give him but I decided that it was time for him to step out and see what big school was like- and well, so far so good! He had a great week and is ready for Monday- bless his little heart!

And last but not least- there is another new student in our family... my sweet Sean, who also started a new school this week. He started language training which has not been as much of a thrill as he had anticipated. It's not bad, but it is a big change. He went from the challenging but with fun all along the way A100 (looking sharp in his suit) class to a week of random but required classes which he said were interesting, but I noticed that he did not come home each evening with the same excitement in his step. And then this week... hello Bahasa Indonesia class (sadly, no more suits required). Since the classes began he has been walking around in a bit of funk. I told him it was as if a cloud or fog had settled just above his shoulders. He explained he was literally grieving the loss of Spanish. He feels like his brain is trying to hold on to it and that in itself was causing a battle for the mental real estate that Spanish so proudly occupied all those year. He talked to a person who had learned several languages in succession and they encouraged him explaining that his Spanish won't be gone forever, it just gets filed away for now. But the battle is not even conscious at this point. He sees a word and automatically starts to pronounce it using the Spanish alphabetic sounds- which isn't too far off but it isn't actually correct, either. Wow... poor guy. It's hard to imagine letting a language go that served as a security blanket and a key to success for so many years, plus we love Spanish- the way it sounds, the poetry/romance, he doesn't really want it to go away- me either.  But, he must, and he must make the mental space to fall in love with Bahasa Indonesia. Easy to say but hard to do. It wasn't that long ago when Spanish was an important part of our getting through our day to day lives. It will take a while before Bahasa Indonesia evokes emotions and wonderful memories the way Spanish does.
I totally get it and feel for him too. Augh! All these people hitting the big emotional walls around me.  I need a break!

"Mr. Bus Driver, please take me someplace where they make mangonadas and play happy songs with an accordion and a polka beat, please!!!!"

         *Oh, wow! I just remembered something that I learned this weekend in my Communication Across Cultures FSI class- that fantasizing about getting out of town is common for someone in the "flight" phase of culture shock. Guess we are just going to have to ride all this out after all, and Lord help us... we are not even in Indonesia yet!

A-100 Journal 6- Swearing In

After a week of interagency training, post research and field trips, our swearing in was last Friday. For me, I was worried that the event would seem very anticlimactic after Flag Day. After all, we knew where we were going. I am happy to report that I was wrong.

I had family coming in from the West Coast, and getting them set up to come into the building for the ceremony took some doing. We don't get to see each other often enough, so every time is special. That they came out to see me was very cool. Then on Friday I met them outside main State, got them in and seated, and passed the time with them and my classmates. The ceremony began promptly on time.

After some remarks that were well-received on what we were getting ready to do and why, our names were called one-by-one in alphabetical order along with our first posts. After we were all standing, a high muckety-muck in the Department administered the oath.

This makes the 3rd time I have taken this oath of service, having joined the Navy and been admitted to a Federal District Court previously. As was mentioned by the keynote speaker, in our country our public servants take an oath not to a ruler, or a land, but to a Constitution. We are basically swearing to protect and defend an idea. I cannot say those words and make that pledge without it affecting me.

I have offered myself to my country in service, and that offer has been accepted. I have bound my fate and my family's to what those in authority decide for me. Because my country sends me to places all around the world (starting in Indonesia!), things can happen that affect our fellow citizens, our host country, and ourselves. There are no guarantees of safety offered for this. It is a risk you take in order to serve. 

As the days have passed since the ceremony, I have found myself stopping what I am doing, replaying the ceremony in my mind, and once again wondering how I have been brought to this place. I am humbled and grateful. I am now a diplomat representing the United States, and I mean to do my job to the best of my ability no matter what.

One day you may find yourself in a strange land and a victim of crime, natural disaster, or political unrest. You will need someone to help that knows the place, the people, and the process and has the authority to render aid. Me or someone like me will be there, because that is what we are charged by the State Department to do. We took an oath on it.

-S

Apartment Living With Three Kids, Falls Church- Oakwood

We would really like it if our blog was chock full of funny posts about all of our travels but maybe one day...eh?  I have wanted to write about the mental gymnastics it takes to go from a big family home  with lots of stuff to living in an apartment since the first week we moved in. I'm glad I have waited until the shock wore off- I think time has sharpened my perspective some.  My five weeks here do not qualify me as an expert but I think others who are searching out details about living at Oakwood/Falls Church might find these types of details helpful.

First, let me make it clear that this is not a rant of any shape or kind. I think the Oakwood staff and crew, Falls Church specifically, does a great job of what they do. Everything is clean, well maintained and the list of summer activities is well planned and impressive. Our youngest son has loved all of the pool games and activities. Just the shuttle service alone is worth its weight in gold... and then add to that the nifty coffee machine that whips up Cafe Mocha anytime I want one (a decaf cafe mocha to be exact), oh ... and the housekeeping crew who shows up sets my life on the straight and narrow once a week! Yes, safe to say I'm happy, really happy about living at Oakwood Falls Church. It goes above and beyond what I expected apartment life to be. 

For those who are moving here and who delight in these types of details -this post is for you!

                                                   This is the view from our balcony

The buildings and facility has:
Beautifully designed rooms for activities and shared meals inside the office area.
B.B.Q pit/bank of gas grills and a couple of tables with nice umbrellas for relaxing while you cook
Work out room
Office center
Beautifully kept pool and hot tub area (with life guards)
Volleyball pit
Convenience store on site (with reasonable prices and lots of choices)
Pro-shop for tennis players
Tennis court
Dry cleaners
Play ground for kids
"Dog" potty areas, including little baggies for your pup's personal needs
 and trash can just for them.
An activity room where kids can meet, play games and a small but sweet library

Kitchen Things Already Stocked For Your Arrival:

knife set, including kitchen shears
Coffee pot
Toaster
Utensils (the usual stuff)
Tongs
Grater
Peeler
Hot pads
2 Kitchen towels
Chopping board
Measuring spoons
Wine opener
Can opener
Nice dishes, plenty of place settings
Wine glasses

Glasses and coffee mugs
Aluminum cookie sheet
Small rectangle glass pan (perfect for brownies)
Measuring cup (one liquid measure/Pyrex type)
Glass bowl set
Salt/pepper shakers (clean and empty)
Butter server
Ash tray (for the balcony only, no smoking indoors)
Plastic pitcher
Ice trays
Rubber spatula                                                                                    
Place mats and cloth napkins
A brightly colored vase
Paper towel holder
Flatware

                                                                                                                                   
  This picture shows the color of the wall in the kitchen in contrast to a brightly colored painting that I added after I got to town. The same brown color is used all throughout the apartment. Imagine dark khaki pants... yep, just the sort of hue to drain the life blood right out of me. I suppose others might find it inspiring- if so- God bless them.

Services:
Oakwood house keepers clean the kitchen, bathrooms, floors, make beds, bring you clean towels weekly and they changes the bed linens weekly.
We also have a small washer/dryer combo in my closet (not all units have these)
The office people will hold and sign for your packages if they are too big for your mailbox.
Wifi
Cable/internet
Your apartment will have a few boxes of Kleenex, TP, paper towels, soaps and a sponge waiting for you. :) Coffee for the first day, too. You replace them when they run out, of course.
Recycling in the first floor trash rooms
Parents' night out babysitting (must register early)
Activities for kids (art/crafts, reading clubs, Beach Week, sports)
Movie nights
Free breakfast on Sunday morning
Probably lots more I am forgetting....

                                 

Other items I didn't expect:
A lockable safe
Vacuum cleaner
Broom/mop
Laundry baskets
A land line telephone, complete with number
A TV in just about every room
A balcony- blank but nicely sized
Iron/ironing board
Hairdryer


                                                                                               
Kitchen Things I Either Had To Buy Or Should Have Brought With Us:

1. Food processor
2. Hand mixer
3. Muffin tins and/or loaf pans.
4. Plastic reusable containers (they have a few here, waiting for you)
5. A few extra kitchen towels



Here is the one thing that I have chosen to spend a little bit of money to keep me sane- 

1. Bedding, actually just pillowcases and throw blankets, and a whole duvet set our bed, all brightly colored! I am an artist and I personally need color in my world. Otherwise everything is either white or beige. Photos below show the before and after.
2. Sun blocking curtains (found them at Goodwill for like $3) and a cheap-o spring curtain rod so that they set inside the window, thus allowing the vertical blinds cover them and hide their ugliness. Our windows are facing East which is wonderful but the sun seems to come up earlier here (East coast... surprise!)
3. Big sturdy bags for grocery shopping. Though we have lovely elevators it is still a pain to use grocery store plastic bags to bring stuff into the apartment. I like having the cloth reusable ones that I can fit lots of groceries into, plus it is as enviro-friendly as it is efficient.
4. Hangers for the big closets
5. Febreeze or some other bathroom spray. We call it the "spray of kindness" at our house. Reason this is so important- bathrooms are void of exhaust fans.





Our bedroom the first day we moved here.














                                                                                                                                                                     Our bedroom now, with color (!!!) and lamps on.




Home away from home? 
It took me several weeks to not feel like we were living in a hotel. There are perks, so many perks, here that we would have to work hard to miss owning a home.  We even had private sector/home owning friends come from out of town and they loved our new place! They got the value of what a place like this is worth living about 5.5 miles from DC proper. These are not small apartments- lots of closet/storage space.

Speaking of friends, the adults and to some degree the kids too, seem to be pretty stiff at first. It can take a while before you feel like your not invisible. There is an odd "I don't see you... you don't see me" no eye contact thing. At first, it struck me as really odd  but after a few weeks the weirdness of that seemed to fade for me, especially when I stuck around long enough to realize that people are moving into and out of these apartments all the time, like daily. Nearly everyone here is the misery of transition/shock! Honestly,  I believe that I was just used to "Texas kind of friendly" and it's just not that way here. A friend who used to live pretty close by explained it like this- "DC and the surrounding area is like a big airport, everyone is going somewhere fast and no one plans sticking around too long so they don't take the time to get to know you". It's so true! So, readjusting my expectations helped but then, I discovered where all the friendly people are... the Oakwood barbecue area- (like duh!)  Now, grilling down in there is a once a week "must do" for our family.  We've learned so much about life in the Foreign Service because of all the helpful folks chillin' out next to the fire/meat area!

  This is our boys' room. It doesn't seem very nice in the photo but the room has a lovely, tall dresser and flat screen television to boot! That closet (open door) has ample room for toys, shoes, clothes and more clothes, shelves, a washer/dryer combo unit, vacuum, and more. I'm showing this photo so that folks can see how they fit two kids into a single room.

   This is our daughter's bedroom/studio apartment. She loves it! What more could a senior in high school want? Unfortunately, this apartment has a shared door between her little casita and her little brothers' room- so lots of grace is required but it is still a cool thing for a kid almost ready to fly the coop.  She has her own entrance, key and bathroom - everything!

   
         
This is my daughter's kitchen, it is identical to my kitchen, but minus the dining room table and pantry.

  
                             

I also want to note how lovely it is to live among such a racially diverse group of folks. It absolutely adds to the fun when you meet people from all over the world, literally. If you enjoy that kind of thing you'll love it here.

A-100 Journal 5- Flag Day

We were told to gather in the auditorium by 3:15. The place was full by 3. Since before we took the written test, some of us years ago, there was always the one question: "Where will you go?" Suddenly we were only twenty minutes away from finding out. On the one hand, we would suddenly know what the next year or two held for us. On the other, we would NOT be going to all those other cool places that were on the list.

Going in to the event, my family full of Class 2 EFMs had left us with only 6 or 7 available overseas posts, plus a slew of Washington, DC jobs. A DC job would have meant having to move out of our apartment in a few weeks' time while hoping to stay in the same school district. It would also have meant a significant decrease in financial stability. I had firmly convinced myself that DC was where we were headed. It would just be too easy to slot us in there.

We had been told to have someone supportive nearby for Flag Day, because after all the rule for FSO's is "go where they tell you to go, do what they tell you to do, and say what they tell you to say." We had no right or expectation for anything, but hoped REALLY hard to be sent overseas.

I had the bid list in front of me when they started reading off names and posts, and was writing the names in for the first few. At that point the stress and anticipation made it impossible to write, so I put the papers down and started with the breathing exercises. A few names were called for places we couldn't qualify for medically, and my classmates screamed in joy and went up the center aisle to claim their flag. 

Then the DC flag came up for the first time, and I thought "here we go." Someone else got that post, and they were happy. So was I since it wasn't mine.

About 10 posts in, a flag that many people mistake for the Polish flag came up. However, it was one I knew very well: 

This is the Indonesian flag, and our embassy is in Jakarta. I had ranked this high, and it was my personal number 2. Hard language training, consular coned, and the timing was so right for our family. They said my first name (one which I shared with others in my class) and my middle initial (one which I did not). I was half way out of my chair before the echo died on my last name and was running. I realized where I was far too late to walk up the center aisle and just kept running all the way around the class and back to the podium. Our class sponsor probably feared she was going to be hip-checked into the wall, but no. A flag, a training schedule, and a future were laying there in my hands as my breathing slowly returned to normal.

My wife was trying to record the event. We can see the Indonesian flag, and then suddenly a chair and peoples' feet as she begins to freak out and forgets the camera. Classic. Our whole family is very excited.

And there it was. Stability, financial security, a new and very challenging language and an amazing first post. Bali, Sumatra and Australia an easy flight away. Will it be perfect? Well, the traffic, heat, and cockroaches you can ride say no. Am I thrilled beyond my wildest dreams? Oh, yes.

The only sad thing is that I only have a week left with this amazing group of people I have come to know and respect. Some of them were certainly not thrilled with their first posts, though you would never know from how everyone reacted. A surprising number of classmates I talked to got posts they rated high. They could tell I was happy and they were happy for me. 

So, here we are. I sold insurance in Laredo, Texas for 9 years in what I have been told by the State Department is "la idioma de la frontera" (the language of the border), something that is not really Spanish at all. Their solution: a Southeast Asian archipelago. Of course.

All I can say to all this is what I have been saying all along. Thank you, thank you, and thank you. I have been blessed beyond imagining, and I know it very well.

-S

Someone PLEASE Make It Be 3pm, Already!

Since we discovered that this whole adventure was underway (back in May) the one thing we have not been able to answer is what country we will be sent to. Oh... if I had a dollar for each time I was asked or thought about it!

All week I've replied to the many loving texts and emails asking me about news or info. If only I knew! So many things are hinged on which country we get. Everything we do has been affected by the hideous wait and the want of this information. Little things, normal things take on a new dimension. It goes something like this-

               Kid: "Mom, check it out. The jacket I want is on sale!"   

                Me: "Well, if we end up living in Jakarta it will be hot all the time. You won't need a jacket. Let's wait and see what we learn on flag day. We don't really know what we need to buy just yet- plus it will add to the weight of all our stuff here. Seriously, please try to hold off on that until Flag Day."

See what I mean? Normal things that have little to do with flag day somehow become all about it and dig the hole deeper. You can take that same conversation/template and swap out the word "jacket" and replace it with "eggs" or  "karate lessons", or "cool socks from Urban Outfitters"... and there you have it! Our life over the last few months.

I've had to seriously re-employ the "wait and see" muscles we developed during our adoption a few years ago. Adoptive parents understand what I'm talking about...the wait. The unbelievable truck loads of hope. The red tape and constant changes to the game plan. The brain battle of trying your best not to get shaken up over the worst possible outcome scenarios. These are important skills to have when you are no longer in control. Flag day and adoption- it is so much the same feeling!

Speaking of feelings... I keep going over my mental "where-o-meter" and trying to catch any vibe in my gut about which country we will be going to -but I keep coming up flat! Therefore, I am nearly completely convinced that we will be posted in DC for a year. My dream machine must be completely out of juice right now because I just can't seem to imagine us anywhere else for the time being.

No matter what tomorrow's big reveal holds, I will know that we are where we are supposed to be- which pretty much sums up the most important thing in Sean's and my life- our belief that God is very present in the details and that He is enjoying the fact we are ready and waiting for our biggest ride yet on the crazy bus.

It is now Friday, August 17th- just after midnight and 3pm seems like forever away. I am awake- which is nothing new- especially this week. My original plan was to try my very best to sleep in on Friday, thus reducing my awake time and making 3 pm come faster. However, it seems me and the kid (previously mentioned) are getting up early to go shopping. I hear there is a big sale on jackets.

-L